We got the beat, cont'd

I saw another news story yesterday, on KGW, about Portland's plan to have two police officers walking a beat in downtown over the holiday season. The second story answered a question I had afer reading the first one, on KOIN. But it also raised a new question.

First, the front man for the new patrol, Derrick Foxworth, is not the former police chief; he's the ex-chief's son, and currently a lieutenant on the Portland force. Two 0-percent unfunded pensions in the same family, with the same name – that could be a unique honor in the whole country.

Chip off the old block.

But here's the new question: How many cops does it take to have two officers on the street from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. every day?

I've been doing the math in my head. The cushy 8 hours a day times 7 days = 56 hours. Two cops (whch is the number that KOIN said would be walking the beat at any given time) times 56 hours a week = 112 total beat hours. Yet Foxworth told Channel 8 that eight officers will be participating. That works out to 14 hours per cop. My question is, what are they doing the rest of the week?

Meanwhile, my blood pressure went up a tick when I saw that KGW had to "both-sides" the story, finding some suburban ninnies who seem to think all cops are bad, and the fewer the better. 

 “It was a little jarring if I’m being honest," said Jack Vanauker, who lives in Beaverton and was visiting Portland Monday. "I’m not used to seeing a bunch of police officers everywhere… that’s not exactly what sells the spirit of the holidays to me is seeing people in uniform with weapons."

 Kaitlyn O’Brien, who also lives in Beaverton and was visiting Portland, added "I think some people feel safer around the police, I don’t think everybody does."

So it would be better if the shoppers had to fend off the junkies and the psychos without cops? Shame on KGW for including that nonsense.

Sadly, people like that vote.

I hope the beat cops help the bleak situation, but given their hours, I'm not expecting much. Nor am I expecting the supposed separate crackdown on retail crime this weekend to get anywhere. The cops can arrest all the people they want, but only D.A. Mikey can prosecute them. And we know he won't, at least not to the extent that it makes a darn bit of difference.

Oh, and guess who else is involved in the crime fighting? Ha! Ha! You can't make this stuff up.


  1. When I saw him on the tv I thought it was his daddy…back at work for Portland Police…must be nice to have connections?

    1. Back east, I know, there is a tradition of cops' kids becoming cops themselves. And especially firefighters' kids. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but I do know being a cop is not fun.

  2. So two police officers spread out over all of downtown is somehow threatening and not in the “holiday spirit?” I suppose seeing naked tweakers screaming at an imaginary foe, or being spit on for not handing over your change is more in line with the Christmas spirit then.

    It must be a real burden to be constantly on the lookout for things to be offended by.

    1. It’s not really a burden. It’s a way of life, cultivated over years of listening to the adults in their lives who claim to be parents.

    2. A lot of it is learned in school, from K to PhD.

    3. I’m glad that I grew up when I did. Why waste the best years of your life on the prowl for things to be offended by? Life is hard enough past a certain age, so it is just futile to spend the time that you have on finding things to be miserable about.

      You’ll get there eventually, without any stimuli from outside.


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