Little Lord Paulson, radioactive as ever

“The Portland Thorns interfered with our access to relevant witnesses and raised specious legal arguments in an attempt to impede our use of relevant documents.”

We've all known from the start to keep a safe distance from Merritt Paulson, who with Daddy's money owns the Portland pro soccer teams. And recently, we've all learned that his henchmen have treated women like dirt and engaged in misconduct that would get any of the rest of us fired. To make matters worse, Little Lord Paulson refuses to discipline anyone in a meaningful way. His minions could shoot somebody dead in the middle of Fifth Avenue, and they would get "training."

But the latest allegation, that his organization has been interfering with and impeding the investigation, by former Deputy Attorney General Sally Yates, into mistreatment of female players – well, that really seals it. These people are too slimy. Portland has a lot of problems right now, and it doesn't need the distinction of having the most evil sports franchise on the West Coast.

A writer at the O – the new sports columnist, I think he is – declared yesterday that His Highness needs to put both the Timbers and the Thorns up for sale. Boy, wouldn't that be interesting? Some prospective third-party buyers would get a look at the team's financials. I'd like to be a fly on that wall.

Today LLP says he won't be involved with running the Thorns any more, at least not for a while. But like everything that comes out of the royal pie hole, it's a load of bad air. Merritt will still be The Man with the Timbers, he still hasn't cleaned house, and he still doesn't really seem to get it. 

The guy at the O is right. The Paulsons need to cash out, and LLP needs to go back to wherever it was he came from before whispering sweet nothings in Randy Leonard's ear 15 years ago.