The woodwork squeaks

Former Portland Mayor Sam Adams has become a walking unemployment statistic. After being chased from City Hall, he ran the City Club until that went sour, then he did something back east for a cup of coffee, then he showed up back in Portland, got the strangest puff piece ever in Willamette Weed, and proceeded to run unsuccessfully for the City Council. He didn't even make it to the runoff.

But when you're a square peg in a job market made of round holes, there's always the City Hall bureaucracy, and last night came the stunning news that the current mayor, F. Ted Wheeler, is thinking about hiring former Mayor Creepy as some sort of aide.

Kind of takes your breath away, doesn't it? What next – will Mingus Mapps bring Fireman Randy back on board for a reunion?

Now, don't think I'm missing the potential for some real comedy gold here, but we've already got more than enough to laugh at, and cry over, in this town right now. I think this is one of those wonderful opportunities on which Ted might want to pass. I'm already skeptical that Wheeler's going to make it through a second term, and adding the scandal-plagued former mayor to the mix seems like a reckless move. 

Four years of Wheeler and Adams together in City Hall? I'll take the under. 

Never hire anybody whose H.R. files require more than one banker's box.