God mace ye, merry gentlemen

The lefties and the righties are already duking it out in front of the Pioneer Courthouse Square holiday tree! The thing has been lit only 24 hours.


Why aren't there two dozen cops stopping this? We need a new police chief, that's for sure.

Comments

  1. "It's deck the halls. Not deck each other."

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  2. We three thugs of Antifa are;
    bearing clubs we traverse afar,
    from the Elk fountain, to Tabor's mountain,
    looking for dumpsters to char.

    Refrain:

    O, march downtown and get ready to fight,
    let's just hope the tear gas is light,
    westward leading, still proceeding,
    guide us to the riot tonight.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks for the kind words. Song parodies make me nostalgic for my father's Mad Magazines that I read as a kid. "What, me worry?"

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    2. I still remember the opening of the Mad IRS song, sung to the tune of "It Came Upon a Midnight Clear":

      They come on April 15th, dear
      To take away our gold

      Wish I could remember the rest of it...

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    3. How about Mad's cartoonist Don Martin? Gary Larson should be so lucky.

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  3. As I drove around downtown for this first time in many months I marveled a the number of tents, shopping carts, and more covering the sidewalks of downtown and Old Town. For reasons that I don't quite understand a biblical passage came to me, "The Poor will always be with you." Matthew 23:11. And then I recalled a rejoinder to that pronouncement that I cannot cite the source of, and it is "Yes lord, but why so many?" And I thought of the often scornful remarks made on line and in the media about how trashed Portland is, full of homelessness, drug abuse, crime and poverty, and wondered how many homeless will be found dead of exposure during this coming cold winter. But then I chided myself for indulging in such maudlin sentimentality, and recalled that it was the Mayor's problem, the police chief's problem, maybe the Governor's problem, but certainly not my problem.

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    1. Geoffrey, As bad as the homeless problem is now we could be facing a true meltdown. 40 million U.S. renters will face eviction as the rent moratoriums run out. And if they're extended the landlords and eventually the banks will be affected. It's the definitive unsustainable situation.

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    2. What's the solution, Bill?

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    3. I don't know if there is a solution. We're in this up to our necks already.

      You know, when I was rolling I would occasionally have a college student or other young person ask for my advice. How do you get a TV writing gig or a newspaper column?...that sort of thing. I thought it was sort of ridiculous that I'd be in the role of dispensing wisdom to the next generation. I mean...please. If they only knew.

      So I used to tell them to learn a skill they could display around a campfire. Maybe if you can entertain the other campers with magic tricks or whatever they'll share part of the rodent they're eating with you. It was meant to be funny.

      One night my duo was playing in Conan's on 39th and Hawthorne and I ran that answer by a couple of young people during a break. I also asked what one of them was doing now and he said he was in a post grad program for journalism. I said, "Jesus, it might already be too late."

      I swear they both looked like they were about to weep. I realized then how uptight these young people are about the future and I never used those answers again.

      Young people are extremely worried about what they see as a very bleak scenario. I see lots of them living in cars right now. It's heartbreaking to think about but a lot of today's students really could end up camping out eating rodents. Tragically, what was once a joke is now some pretty good advice.

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  4. An Income Tax Deadline Carol. Mad magazine, issue #58, October 1960:

    https://www.madcoversite.com/mad058-carols.html

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